“What made you smile today?” is a question I frequently start my classes with. Usually, a moment or two passes in silence, and I volunteer to go first. “I had an ice cream right before coming to this class, which made me and my tummy really happy!”. Some of them look at me, remembering that happiness could be so small and drama-free.
Very often, a handful of the kids will exclaim, “nothing!!”. I was curious. Could it be possible that at 5 or 6 years old, they have not a single moment of happiness in their day? I suppose that is not entirely surprising when negative emotions leave a more lasting impression than positive ones. The kids would rush to tell me about a fall they had, a fight with a friend, or some other unfairness that happened earlier but struggle to find a single good thing in their day. Sometimes they repeat a particular unfortunate event multiple times, and I learnt that when someone (kid or big kid) hasn’t let go of something, it usually means that they have yet to feel heard or understood. They hold it in their tiny pockets and whip it out to show anyone, and they keep doing so until someone holds space for their grievances.
I think it is essential to acknowledge (and practice accepting) the world’s dualities-that we are constantly negotiating and navigating all sorts of complex and joyous events. However, I still believe that it is just as important to practice noticing things that lift you. Like receiving the single sakura petal that lands on your dress, a buzzing bee in early winter, doing a last dive into the flowers before retreating to their hives, and this tiny funny moment in class last week:
It’s a short one for a long month, but as always, thank you for tuning in!
This month’s play-list:
This elaborate and interactive diagram of cognitive biases
This lovely exhibition, inspired by the classic picture book Goodnight Moon
This powerful twitter account with the bio: Employers, if you tweet about International Women's Day, I'll retweet your gender pay gap 💥